2009-02-28

funny pm

# I'm being abducted by aliens. I'll see you yesterday!
# I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on eBay
# Chocolate makes my clothes shrink!
*Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark
Real life needs a search function... I need my socks.
I run with scissors... makes me feel dangerous!
I'm a leader, not a follower
I'm not going to change who I am for other people.
Limitation and defeat must never be accepted, truly admirable are those who turn adversity into a personal victory
Cooler than cool, Stronger than diamonds!
Living in the brightest sunshine, and loving every minute.
Don't like my attitude? Call 1800-KISS-MY-ASS
Unite against togetherness!
Reality Sucks! Iâm Gonna Keep On Dreamin
If your name was homework, I'd be doing you on my desk right now...
By the time you read this, you've already read it
Don`t steal, the government hates competition
When life hands you a lemon, break out the tequila and the salt!
I`ve lost my phone number, can I have yours?
Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but milk do?
Gravity always wins
There are some that are wise and others that are otherwise
Buy land, they have quit making it!
I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every minute of it
Time is what keeps things from happening all at once
What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?
Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up too..
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most
Children in the dark cause accidents. Accidents in the dark cause children
Panties aren't a mans best friend, but they are next to it
All generalizations are false
A clean dwelling place is the sign of a disturbed mind
This isn't school! This is Hell with fluorescent lighting
Next week there can't be any crisis. My schedule is full already
War does not determine who is right... but who is left
If you are drinking to forget, pay in advance
If at first you do not succeed, destroy all evidence that you ever tried
In the event of an emergency landing why do the people in the pamphlet look so calm?
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights do make a left
3 words to ruin a guys ego..is it in??
You can better lose a lover than love a loser
I'm only crazy when other people cant stand that I'm right
Me breaking the rules? No. I test their elasticity
Geniuses are never understood in their own lifetimes
You can trust the government, just ask the Indians
Everybody makes mistakes, that`s why they put erasers on pencils
People who think they know everything are annoying to those of us who do
Bad Spellers Untie!
Those who know do not say, those who say do not know

On a group of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of nowhere

On a group of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of nowhere, the following people are stranded:
two Italian men and one Italian woman
two French men and one French woman
two German men and one German woman
two Greek men and one Greek woman
two English men and one English woman
two Bulgarian men and one Bulgarian woman
two Japanese men and one Japanese woman
two Chinese men and one Chinese woman
two American men and one American woman
two Irish men and one Irish woman

One month later on these absolutely stunning deserted islands in the middle of nowhere, the following things have occurred:
One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.

The two French men and the French woman are living happily together in a menage-a-trois.

The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of alternating visits with the German woman.

The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them.

The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman.

The two Bulgarian men took one long look at the endless ocean and another long look at the Bulgarian woman and started swimming.

The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are awaiting instructions.

The two Chinese men have set up a pharmacy/liquor/ convenience store/restaurant/laundry, and have gotten the woman pregnant in order to supply employees for their store.

The two American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide, because the American woman keeps on complaining about her body, the true nature of feminism, how she can do everything they can do, the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how sand and palm trees make her look fat, how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her nicer than they do, all the sales she's missing, how her relationship with her mother is improving, and how at least the taxes are low and it isn't raining. The American woman, meanwhile, watches the men fart and scratch.

The two Irish men divided the island into North and South and set up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it gets sort of foggy after the first few liters of coconut whiskey. But they're satisfied, because at least the English aren't having any fun.

2009-02-22

The Cookie Thief

This is to a scenario encouraging us not to rush into judgments.

A woman was waiting at an airport one night With several long hours before her flight. She hunted for a book in the airport shop Bought a bag of cookies and found a place to drop. She was engrossed in her book but happened to see That the man beside her as bold as could be Grabbed a cookie or two from the bag between Which she tried to ignore to avoid a scene. She munched cookies and watched the clock As this gutsy cookie thief diminished her stock.

She was getting more irritated as the minutes ticked by Thinking "If I wasn't so nice I'd blacken his eye". With each cookie she took he took one too And when only one was left she wondered what he'd do. With a smile on his face and a nervous laugh He took the last cookie and broke it in half.

He offered her half as he ate the other She snatched it from him and thought "Oh brother, this guy has some nerve and he's also rude Why he didn't even show any gratitude".

She had never known when she had been so galled and sighed with relief when her flight was called. She gathered her belongings and headed for the gate Refusing to look back at the thieving ingrate. She boarded the plane and sank in her seat Then sought her book which was almost complete. As she reached in her baggage she gasped with surprise There was her bag of cookies in front of her eyes:

"If mine are here" she moaned with despair "Then the others were his and he tried to share"

"Too late to apologize she realized with grief" That she was the rude one, the ungrateful, the thief

deep silence

sometimes you are surrounded with such silence that you can hear your brain cells working and sending impulses, you hear your thoughts moving through your body and stucking in mind.
sometimes you look outside the window, see lonely streets, snow all everywhere, cars standing at the roadside, latern lights and no alive beings. you look outside in the night and feel like time has stopped. like there is infinity from beginning of the minute till its last second.
sometimes you feel like you are in wrong place and you should be somewhere else.
just a week left here in old flat. how old can flat be in which you`re living just half year. feel somehow sick from changing flats that often. maybe coz im doing that alone.
packing things, chaos, new place and new ways to usual places.
maybe its hard to move somewhere when you know that its not gonna be home for you. just a place to stay. for a while. till you`ll be able to be with person besides whom is your home.
one more thing discovered once more about myself - i work better in extreme situations.
even if i have some time to do something i`ll do that in the last moment [unless thats something i really really like or its important for me]. adrenalin? or just my craziness? let it be a secret of "trade-mark".
still surrounded by silence and listening to thoughts hitting walls of mind.

2009-02-09

the biscuit factory story

the biscuit factory story (making assumptions, other people's perspectives, individual needs and motivations)

This is a true story. Some years ago the following exchange was broadcast on an Open University sociology TV programme.

An interviewer was talking to a female production-line worker in a biscuit factory. The dialogue went like this:

Interviewer: How long have you worked here?

Production Lady: Since I left school (probably about 15 years).

Interviewer: What do you do?

Production Lady: I take packets of biscuits off the conveyor belt and put them into cardboard boxes.

Interviewer: Have you always done the same job?

Production Lady: Yes.

Interviewer: Do you enjoy it?

Production Lady: Oooh Yes, it's great, everyone is so nice and friendly, we have a good laugh.

Interviewer (with a hint of disbelief): Really? Don't you find it a bit boring?

Production Lady: Oh no, sometimes they change the biscuits...

* Do not impose your own needs and ambitions on to other people who may not share them.
* Don't assume that things that motivate you will motivate someone else.
* Recognise that sources of happiness may vary widely between people.

the train travellers story

the train travellers story (relationships, assumptions, etc)

A wealthy businessman who is used to getting his own way finds himself sharing a sleeper compartment with a beautiful young woman as they travel to Brussells on the train. It is winter and the heating is not working so the compartment is cold.

The two settle down to sleep.

"Two strangers, on a train..." says the businessman.

"Yes," says the woman.

"A man and a woman - away from home - probably never meet again.." Says the businessman.

"Yes," says the woman.

"It's cold, isn't it?" says the businessman.

"Yes," says the woman.

"Could you pass me another blanket?" says the businessman, "... Or maybe we could pretend to be man and wife for tonight?.."

"Yes, that would be good," says the woman, "Get your own bloody blanket."

the very old lady story

the very old lady story (positive attitude, self-image, ageism)

A very old lady looked in the mirror one morning. She had three remaining hairs on her head, and being a positive soul, she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today." So she braided her three hairs, and she had a great day.

Some days later, looking in the mirror one morning, preparing for her day, she saw that she had only two hairs remaining. "Hmm, two hairs... I fancy a centre parting today." She duly parted her two hairs, and as ever, she had a great day.

A week or so later, she saw that she had just one hair left on her head. "One hair huh...," she mused, "I know, a pony-tail will be perfect." And again she had a great day.

The next morning she looked in the mirror. She was completely bald.

"Finally bald huh," she said to herself, "How wonderful! I won't have to waste time doing my hair any more.."

the god and eve story - LOOOOL

the god and eve story (gender and sexual discrimination, equality, battle of the sexes debates, after-dinner speaking, etc)

"God, I've been thinking.." says Eve one day.

"What's on your mind Eve?" says God.

"Well, I know that you created me and this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful creatures, but lately I've been feeling that maybe there's more to life."

"Go on..." says God.

"Sometimes I get a bit bored - I fancy a bit of fun. And I get a bit fed up with all the heaving lifting and carrying, and warding off the mammoths and sabre-toothed tigers, not to mention that bloody snake. This garden can be dangerous place."

"I see," says God, pausing for thought.

"Eve, I have a cunning plan," says God, "I shall create Man for you."

"Man?" asks Eve, "What is Man?"

"Man..." says God, "Is a flawed creature. He will have many weaknesses and disgusting habits. Man will lie, cheat and behave like an idiot - in fact mostly he'll be a complete pain in the backside. But on the plus side he'll be big and strong, and will be able to protect you, and hunt and kill things, which might be handy sometimes. He will tend to lose control of mind and body when aroused, but with a bit training can reach an acceptable standard in the bedroom department, if you know what I mean."

"Hmm," says Eve, "Seems like this Man idea might be worth a try, but tell me God, is there anything else I need to know?"

"Just this," says God, "Man comes with one condition... In keeping with his arrogant, deluded, self-important character, Man will naturally believe that he was made first, and frankly we all have better things to do than argue, so you must keep all this a secret between us, if that's okay with you. You know, woman to woman.."

the stamp story

the stamp story (customer services, communications, product design, customer inertia)

The staff at an old people's home were puzzled when one of the residents began gargling with TCP. They asked her why but all she would say was that something had happened at the post-office. This is what actually occurred.

The old lady, who rarely ventured out, had visited the post office to post a letter.

She bought a stamp, and since there was a long queue behind her she stepped aside. She put her change in her purse, licked the stamp and put it on her letter. Despite pressing and thumping and licking it again, the stamp failed to stick.

"Excuse me, this stamp won't stick," said the old lady.

"You need to peel the paper off the back," explained the clerk.

The old lady put on her spectacles, fiddled for a few seconds to peel off the backing paper - and then licked the stamp again.

"It still won't stick," interrupted the old lady again.

"It's a self-stick stamp," said the assistant.

"Well this one isn't sticking at all - there's something wrong with it," demanded the old lady.

"Well it won't stick now because you've licked it."

"Well I'm totally confused now," said the old lady.

"Just give it here and I'll post it for you," said the cashier, and doing her best to explain continued, "These new stamps don't need licking. They are self-sticking. They save time. They are already sticky."

The old lady continued to look blankly at the assistant.

"Look," said the well-meaning but desperate post-office clerk, "Just imagine they've already been licked..."

Which sent the old lady scurrying out of the door and across the road to the chemist.

the bath and the bucket story

the bath and the bucket story (lateral thinking, making assumptions, dangers of judging people)

The story illustrates lateral thinking, narrow-mindedness, the risks of making assumptions, and judging people and situations:

A party of suppliers was being given a tour of a mental hospital.

One of the visitors had made some very insulting remarks about the patients.

After the tour the visitors were introduced to various members of staff in the canteen.

The rude visitor chatted to one of the security staff, Bill, a kindly and wise ex-policeman.

"Are they all raving loonies in here then?" said the rude man.

"Only the ones who fail the test," said Bill.

"What's the test?" said the man.

"Well, we show them a bath full of water, a bucket, a jug and an egg-cup, and we ask them what's the quickest way to empty the bath," said Bill.

"Oh I see, simple - the normal ones know it's the bucket, right?"

"No actually," said Bill, "The normal ones say pull out the plug. Should I check when there's a bed free for you?"

double-positive story

double-positive story (make your point and then know when to stop, language, communications, lateral thinking, quick-thinking)

On hearing one of his students use the expression, "I don't know nothing about it..." a teacher took the opportunity to explain about double negatives and correct grammar to the class.

The teacher explained, "In the English language a double negative makes the statement positive, so your assertion that you 'don't know nothing about it' is actually an admission that you do know something about it."

Encouraged by the interest in this revelation among certain class members, the teacher went on to demonstrate more of his knowledge of world languages: "Of course not all languages operate according to the same grammatical rules, for example, in Russian, a double negative remains negative, although perhaps surprisingly, there is not a single language anywhere in the world in which a double positive makes a negative.."

At which a voice from the back of the classroom called out ironically "Yeah, right.."

the trench-digger story

the trench-digger story (initiative, self-development, making things happen, career advancement, how to get a job requiring experience when you have none)

This is adapted from (apparently) a true story.

An elderly couple retired to the countryside - to a small isolated cottage overlooking some rugged and rocky heathland.

One early morning the woman saw from her window a young man dressed in working clothes walking on the heath, about a hundred yards away. He was carrying a spade and a small case, and he disappeared from view behind a copse of trees.

The woman thought no more about it but around the same time the next day she saw the man again, carrying his spade and a small case, and again he disappeared behind the copse.

The woman mentioned this to her husband, who said he was probably a farmer or gamekeeper setting traps, or performing some other country practice that would be perfectly normal, and so not to worry.

However after several more sightings of the young man with the spade over the next two weeks the woman persuaded her husband to take a stroll - early, before the man tended to arrive - to the copse of trees to investigate what he was doing.

There they found a surprisingly long and deep trench, rough and uneven at one end, becoming much neater and tidier towards the other end.

"How strange," the old lady said, "Why dig a trench here - and in such difficult rocky ground?" and her husband agreed.

Just then the young man appeared - earlier than his usual time.

"You're early," said the old woman, making light of their obvious curiosity, "We wondered what you were doing - and we also wondered what was in the case."

"I'm digging a trench," said the man, who continued, realising a bigger explanation was appropriate, "I'm actually learning how to dig a good trench, because the job I'm being interviewed for later today says that experience is essential - so I'm getting the experience. And the case - it's got my lunch in it."

He got the job.

the mobile phone story

the mobile phone story (assumptions, authority, control, the risks of modern communications and technology, privacy, security, identity theft, etc)

Several men were in a golf club locker room.

A mobile phone rings.

"Yes I can talk," says the man answering the call, "You're shopping are you? That's nice."

The listening men smile to each other.

"You want to order those new carpets? Okay.. And they'll include the curtains for an extra five thousand?.. Sure, why not?"

More smiles among the listeners.

"You want to book that week on Necker Island?.. They're holding the price at twenty-two thousand?.. Sounds a bargain.. You want a fortnight?.. If that's what you want honey, okay by me."

Smiles turn to expressions of mild envy.

"And you want to give the builder the go-ahead for the new conservatory? Seventy-five thousand if we say yes today? Sounds fair.. sure, that's fine."

The listeners exchange glances of amazement.

"Okay sugar, see you later.. Yes, love you too," says the man, ending the call.

He looks at the other men and says, "Whose phone is this anyhow?.."

the old lady and the hearing-aid story

the old lady and the hearing-aid story (assumptions about weaknesses, underestimating people, tactical advantage)

An old lady had a hearing-aid fitted, hidden underneath her hair.

A week later she returned to the doctor for her check-up.

"It's wonderful - I can hear everything now," she reported very happily to the doctor.

"And is your family pleased too?" asked the doctor.

"Oh I haven't told them yet," said the old lady, "And I've changed my will twice already.."

the preacher and the farmer story

the preacher and the farmer story (understanding the needs of your people, caring for minorities and individuals, looking deeper than the mainstream)

An old hill farming crofter trudges several miles through freezing snow to his local and very remote chapel for Sunday service. No-one else is there, aside from the clergyman.

"I'm not sure it's worth proceeding with the service - might we do better to go back to our warm homes and a hot drink?.." asks the clergyman, inviting a mutually helpful reaction from his audience of one.

"Well, I'm just a simple farmer," says the old crofter, "But when I go to feed my herd, and if only one beast turns up, I sure don't leave it hungry."

So the clergyman, feeling somewhat ashamed, delivers his service - all the bells and whistles, hymns and readings, lasting a good couple of hours - finishing proudly with the fresh observation that no matter how small the need, our duty remains. And he thanks the old farmer for the lesson he has learned.

"Was that okay?" asks the clergyman, as the two set off home.

"Well I'm just a simple farmer," says the old crofter, "But when I go to feed my herd, and if only one beast turns up, I sure don't force it to eat what I brought for the whole herd..."

From which we see the extra lesson, that while our duty remains regardless of the level of need, we have the additional responsibility to ensure that we adapt our delivery (of whatever is our stock in trade) according to the requirements of our audience.

the doctor and the thief story

the doctor and the thief story (ethical decision making - also adaptability, flexibility, accepting what cannot be changed)

A man goes to the doctor and says "Doctor, I've become a compulsive thief."

The doctor prescribes him a course of tablets and says, "If you're not cured in a couple of weeks would you get me a widescreen television?"

This is not a lesson of ideal behaviour, it's a humorous illustration of options - whether to try to change something, to accept it or to actively support it. Such decisions normally have two main reference points - the difficulty of the change, and the ethical implications of the situation.

the blind men and the road story

the blind men and the road story (stretching, dependency, risk, achievement under pressure)

A blind man had been waiting a while at a busy road for someone to offer to guide him across, when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

"Excuse me," said the tapper, "I'm blind - would you mind guiding me across the road?"

The first blind man took the arm of the second blind man, and they both crossed the road.

Apparently this is a true story. The first blind man was the jazz pianist George Shearing. He is quoted (in Bartlett's Anecdotes) as saying after the event, "What could I do? I took him across and it was the biggest thrill of my life."

There are times when we think we cannot do something and so do not stretch or take a risk. Being forced to stretch and take a risk can often help us to reduce our dependencies (on others, or our own personal safety mechanisms), and to discover new excitement and capabilities.

the john wayne story

the john wayne story (instructions, communications, understanding, confused messages)

It is said that when filming the biblical epic The Greatest Story Ever Told, the director George Stevens was trying to encourage extra passion from John Wayne when delivering the highly significant line, "Truly, this was the Son of God."

"You are talking about Jesus - think about it," said Stevens, "You've got to say it with awe."

For the next take John Wayne duly summoned his most intense feelings. He paused dramatically, and said:

"Aw, truly this was the Son of God."

the soldiers and the trench story

the soldiers and the trench story (leadership)

The story goes that sometime, close to a battlefield over 200 years ago, a man in civilian clothes rode past a small group of exhausted battle-weary soldiers digging an obviously important defensive position. The section leader, making no effort to help, was shouting orders, threatening punishment if the work was not completed within the hour.

"Why are you are not helping?" asked the stranger on horseback.

"I am in charge. The men do as I tell them," said the section leader, adding, "Help them yourself if you feel strongly about it."

To the section leader's surprise the stranger dismounted and helped the men until the job was finished.

Before leaving the stranger congratulated the men for their work, and approached the puzzled section leader.

"You should notify top command next time your rank prevents you from supporting your men - and I will provide a more permanent solution," said the stranger.

Up close, the section leader now recognized General Washington, and also the lesson he'd just been taught.

(This story is allegedly based on truth. Whatever, similar examples are found in history, and arise in modern times too, so please forgive the mythical possibility of the above attribution; the story's message is more important than its historical accuracy.)

the school story

the school story (attendance, sickness, responsibility, parenting, and various other uses)

My apologies if this story is well-known to you. It's an old joke, yet a useful illustration for various themes.

A mother repeatedly called upstairs for her son to get up, get dressed and get ready for school. It was a familiar routine, especially at exam time.

"I feel sick," said the voice from the bedroom.

"You are not sick. Get up and get ready," called the mother, walking up the stairs and hovering outside the bedroom door.

"I hate school and I'm not going," said the voice from the bedroom, "I'm always getting things wrong, making mistakes and getting told off. Nobody likes me, and I've got no friends. And we have too many tests and they are too confusing. It's all just pointless, and I'm not going to school ever again."

"I'm sorry, but you are going to school," said the mother through the door, continuing encouragingly, "Really, mistakes are how we learn and develop. And please try not to take criticism so personally. And I can't believe that nobody likes you - you have lots of friends at school. And yes, all those tests can be confusing, but we are all tested in many ways throughout our lives, so all of this experience at school is useful for life in general. Besides, you have to go, you are the headteacher."

stranded car dilemma story

stranded car dilemma story (creative thinking, ethics, decision-making)

This story is adapted from a scenario which featured in a widely circulated email, in which (supposedly) job applicants were given loosely the following question to answer, to indicate their personality and decision-making motives (supposedly). The job application context is extremely doubtful, but the lesson in creative thinking is interesting, especially if people are not given too long to dwell on it:

You are driving alone in two-seater car on a deserted road in blizzard conditions, when you see another car which has recently run off the road and into a tree. There are three people in the stranded car, none of whom is injured:

* an old friend, who once saved your life
* your childhood sweetheart greatest lost love
* an elderly lady

No-one has a phone. The likelihood of any more passing traffic is effectively zero. The conditions are too dangerous for people to walk anywhere. It is not possible to tow the crashed car. The nearest town is an hour's drive away.

The question is: Given that your car is just a two-seater, in what order should the stranded people be taken to the nearest town?

...................


























(supposed) answer to the 'stranded car dilemma'

There is no right or wrong answer to this, and it's a daft scenario anyway, but the most creatively balanced solution is arguably: Ask your old friend to drive the old lady to the town and raise the alarm, while you and your lost love keep each other warm and wait for help to arrive.

circus story

circus story (developing young people, talent, career choice, parenting)

This short story - it's a joke really - can be used to illustrate attitudes to developing young people, career direction, and especially the advice and aspirations of parents and coaches, which might be different to the dreams of the individual...

In a circus, the Bearded Lady and the World's Strongest Man fell in love, and decided to start a family.

Soon the Bearded Lady fell pregnant.

A few weeks before she was due to give birth, the Bearded Lady and the circus ring-master were talking.

"How's it going?" the ring-master asked, "Are you well?"

"Yes thanks - very excited," said the bearded lady, "We have so many plans for the baby - we want to be supportive parents."

"That's nice," said the ring-master, "Do you want a boy or a girl?"

"Oh, we really don't mind as long as it's healthy," said the Bearded Lady, "And it fits into the cannon.."

the fairy story

the fairy story (strategic alliances, tactical awareness, ageism, sexism, being careful about what you wish for and how you go about getting it)

A couple were dining out together celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary.

After the meal, the husband presented his wife romantically with a beautiful very old gold antique locket on a chain.

Amazingly when his wife opened the locket, a tiny fairy appeared.

Addressing the astonished couple, the fairy said, "Your forty years of devotion to each other has released me from this locket, and in return I can now grant you both one wish each - anything you want.."

Without hesitating, the wife asked, "Please, can I travel to the four corners of the world with my husband, as happy and in love as we've always been?"

The fairy waved her wand with a flourish, and magically there on the table were two first-class tickets for a round-the-world holiday.

Staggered, the couple looked at each other, unable to believe their luck.

"Your turn," said the fairy and the wife to the husband.

The husband thought for a few seconds, and then said, with a little guilt in his voice, "Forgive me, but to really enjoy that holiday of a lifetime - I yearn for a younger woman - so I wish that my wife could be thirty years younger than me."

Shocked, the fairy glanced at the wife, and with a knowing look in her eye, waved her wand.....

and the husband became ninety-three.

2009-02-05

with you! <3 my angel!



I need ya boo
I gotta see ya boo
And the hearts all over
the world tonight,
Said the hearts all
over the world
tonight

I need ya boo, (ooh)
I gotta see ya boo(hey)
And the hearts all over
the world tonight,
Said the hearts all
over the world
tonight

[Verse 1]
Hey! Little mama,
Ooh, you a stunna
Hot..lil figure,
Yes, you a winner
And I'm so glad to be yours,
You're a class of your own
And..
Ooh, little cutie
When..you talk to me
I swear.. the whole world stops
You're.. my sweetheart
And I'm so glad that you're mine
You are one of a kind and..

[Bridge]
You mean to me
What I mean to you and..
Together baby,
There is nothing we won't do
Cuz if I gotchu,
I don't need money,
I don't need cars,
Girl, you're my all.
And..

[Chorus]
Oh!
I'm into you,
And girl,
No..one else would do,
Cuz with every kiss
and every hug,
You make me fall in love,
And now I.. know I can't
be the only one,
I bet there's hearts
all over the world
tonight,
With the love of their
life who feel..
Wat I feel when I'm

With you [x5]
Ahh Girl..
With you [x5]

[Verse 2]
Oh Girl!
I don't want nobody else,
Without you, there's
no one left then,
You're like Jordans on Saturday,
I gotta have you and I
cannot wait now,
Hey! little shorty,
Say.. you care for me,
[ Find more Lyrics at www.mp3lyrics.org/aB ]
You know.. I care for you,
You know... that I'll be true,
You know.. that I won't lie,
You know.. that I will try,
To be your everything..yeah..

[Bridge]
Cuz if I got chu,
I don't need money,
I don't need cars,
Girl, you're my all.
And yeah..

[Chorus]
Oh!
I'm into you,
And girl,
No..one else would do,
Cuz with every kiss
and every hug,
You make me fall in love,
And now I.. know I can't
be the only one,
I bet there's hearts
all over the world
tonight,
With the love of their
life who feel..
Wat I feel when I'm

With you [x5]
Ohh..
With you [x5]
Yeah Heh..

[Bridge 2]
And I..
Will never try to deny,
That you were my whole life,
Cuz if you ever let me go,
I would die..
So I won't front,
I don't need another woman,
I just need your
all and nothing,
Cos' if I got that,
Then I'll be straight
Baby, you're the best
part of my day...

I need ya boo
I gotta see ya boo
And the hearts all over
the world tonight,
Said the hearts all
over the world
tonight
Woo Ooohh.. Yeah~
They need ya boo
They gotta see ya boo
Said the hearts
all over the world
tonight,
Hearts all over the
world tonight

[Chorus]
Oh!
I'm into you,
And girl,
No..one else would do,
Cuz with every kiss
and every hug,
You make me fall in love,
And now I.. know I can't
be the only one,
I bet there's hearts
all over the world
tonight,
With the love of their
life who feel..
Wat I feel when I'm

With you [x5]
Ahh Girl..
With you [x5]
Ohh..
With you [x5]
With you.. only with you
With you [x5]
hey yeah

duck :D

Once I saw a duck walking down the street so I went into Subway and ordered two pieces of bread, and they informed me that they could not do that, like there was some speical rule at Subway that two pieces of bread weren't allowed to touch. So the woman asked me what I wanted on the sandwich and I said I do not care it is for a duck, and she was like oh then it's free. I was not aware that ducks eat for free at Subway. It's like give me a chicken fajita sub, but don't worry about ringing it up, it is for a duck.

little confession

was sitting in the bus today.. had one hour to go to place i can get in 15mins. then i thought that i better go till end of bus route and get out on the way back. bus were moving to airport. some kinda magic place for me. it has brought me to the most happiest times in my life. and it has been place which took me away from most wonderful places and from my loved one arms.
but it somehow magnatizes me.
but i guess not about that was my story. i was sitting in the bus. watching outside the window. watching grey-brown pictures through glass. coldness not just outside but also inside the bus. icy fingers n cold thoughts.
i somehow thought about that thing, that people valuate what they have in their lives just when they loose it. i guess here i have get out of normal person frames - i know the value of the most important person in my life, i know what he means to me and no matter what happens with the world, with people and anything else in huge universe, i dont wana and i cant loose him.
i know the value in my life of my family and those few friends i have.
guess thats all what i wanted to tell now.. just that i know.. like some small nice smily friend told me: "i know!" (:

escalator never breaks

“An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You would never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.”